LJ was a bitch and wouldn't let me post it in one post (shit, that's the first time for something I've written myself! This is fucking long, jesus) so there's a link to part two at the bottom of the page. It's not supposed to be split up, but it hast to be, alas. ♥
Title: Unexpected Happiness
Disclaimer: Konomi might axe murder me for this, but they're still his characters
Pairing: Golden Pair, implied others
Warnings: M-PREG. Yes, this fic is about m-preg. You have been warned. Aside from that, BL, talk of sex (because that's where babies come from ♥), language, general gayety. Um... and it requires general suspension of your disbelief, because... m-preg, guys.
Author's Note: Okay, so I'm a horrible, terrible person, but I enjoyed every second of this and I'm not promising to stop, either. I FEEL NO SHAME!! Er... that being said, this is all yomimashou's fault. Enjoy!
It all started when Eiji collapsed on the tennis courts at late practice one average Monday afternoon. Everything had been going perfectly normally up until that point, for the most part, at least; Seigaku's Golden Pair, reinstated as Regulars even in their second year of high school, had been playing a practice match against a pair of seniors, which was business as always. The only oddity was that Golden Pair was losing; they had yet to lose a doubles match to any of their sempai this year, but for some reason, today, it seemed, Eiji just wasn't all there; his acrobatics were less daring, his jumps less high, his feats of flexibility less impressive. Generally, it seemed as if he was having trouble with stamina, for which Oishi had been gently chastising him for the duration of the game thus far. Every time Oishi commented, however, Eiji responded with an apology and a promise that he'd try harder, yet his energy level seemed to sink lower and lower until, six games in and at a score of 4-2, Eiji's legs seemed to give out entirely and he collapsed to the ground.
Oishi was at his side in an instant, of course, asking what had happened, if he was all right. Eiji tried to wave him away, sitting up and promising that he was fine, but when his legs wobbled at his second attempted to stand, Oishi stepped in, scooped him into his arms, and insisted he be brought to the infirmary.
"But Shuuichirouuuuuu!" Eiji whined, "I'm fine, really! I've probably got a cold or something, I've been feeling a little nauseous lately, too. I'll take a nap when I get home!"
"Rikkai's Yukimura collapsed right before he was hospitalized," Oishi replied sternly. "What if you have Guillane Barre?"
"Shuuichirou." Eiji's voice was exasperated; he knew Oishi would always worry too much for him, but that was a little bit much. "I don't have Guillane Barre. I'm fine. Please, let me go back to practice?"
"I'm taking you to the infirmary because I love you and I don't want anything to happen to you," Oishi responded without a missing a beat, "And I'll wait with you there and walk you home."
And Eiji couldn't really argue with that.
After a brief examination, the school nurse ended up hypothesizing anemia and sending Eiji to get blood work done. Eiji very dutifully followed Oishi back to the hospital to see his uncle, letting Oishi hold his hand the entire way there. So that, if you pass out again, Oishi had explained, I'll be there to catch you. Eiji only smiled in response, and didn't bother correcting that he hadn't passed out, he had only collapsed, and really, it wasn't the same thing at all. It was the thought that counted, after all, and though sometimes it could get to be a bit much, Oishi's doting was awfully sweet.
Oishi also insisted on accompanying Eiji back to the hospital three days later to get the results of the blood work, even though Eiji had not collapsed since then, and had only been feeling slightly sick and mostly right when he woke up. He assured Oishi again and again that it was nothing, but Oishi was now sure that it was either anemia, as the nurse had said, or else some severe degenerative nerve disorder, and either way, he was not going to let any misfortune come to his Eiji. And so Eiji let himself be escorted again, because, even though Oishi really didn't need to worry so much, it was really nice to have him there, and it was really sweet that he cared so much. It was simply his nature, and Eiji teased him about being the mother of Seigaku on the train ride to the hospital. Oishi blushed and commented softly that he certainly wasn't Eiji's mother, which made Eiji blush as well, and he made no comment as Oishi took his hand again to lead him back into the hospital.
When Oishi's uncle brought the blood test results out to them, he looked serious, borderline stressed. It was the same sort of look Oishi wore when he was arranging the blocks for a ranking match back in middle school, or when he came across a particularly difficult math problem doing his homework, and Eiji found it rather attractive, though moreso on Oishi because he was a lot younger and more handsome in general and the love of Eiji's life. Eiji looked up attentively, sitting a little closer to Oishi in the joined waiting room chairs that was probably strictly kosher, and the doctor raised an eyebrow at him. "Kikumaru-kun... whose blood did you give me for these tests?"
Eiji furrowed his brow, confused. "Mine, of course. Who else's would it be?"
Oishi's uncle looked at Oishi for a moment before meeting Eiji's eyes again. "Are you absolutely positive? If there's something you were trying to hide, since you're Shuuichirou's friend, I won't tell anyone, but you need to be honest with me, Kikumaru-kun. So that I can make sure you're healthy."
"It's mine," Eiji replied with a bit of a huff. "Why don't you believe me? I'm perfectly healthy, aren't I? I don't have Guillane Barre or whatever it is?"
The doctor looked at the clipboard in his hand for a long moment before turning back to Eiji. "No... no, you don't have Guillane Barre, and you're not anemic, either."
Triumphant, Eiji turned to Oishi. "I told you it was nothing! I'm perfectly fine, everything's normal--"
But he was cut off by Oishi's uncle, whose voice sounded just slightly off-pitch, and whose face was a mixture of worry and confusion in a way that made Eiji's stomach knot a little. "There's something else."
Suddenly, Eiji's voice was missing, and it was Oishi, voice tense and obviously weighted with worry, who finally asked, "What is it?"
Oishi's uncle swallowed, looking at the clipboard one last time, as if, somehow, the results had changed during the course of the exchange. Apparently, they hadn't, however, and he set the board aside, clasping his hands in front of him and wringing his palms for a moment. He probably, Eiji thought, couldn't have built the suspense more if he tried, and, being the impatient person he was, Eiji tried again, "What is it?"
The doctor sighed and half-shrugged, as if in abandon. "Kikumaru-kun... you're pregnant."
Eiji had his blood taken again for another round of tests before being sent home for lack of anything else to be done. The situation was so far removed from the ordinary that Oishi's uncle hadn't known what else to do besides assure Eiji that they'd figure something out and would be in contact, and then to send Eiji and Oishi home.
Eiji spent the train ride in a state of utter confusion, because none of this made sense. Boys couldn't get pregnant. It was impossible. He knew he wasn't very bright, but that much, he was sure of; even if he was sleeping with a boy, that didn't mean he was a girl. Right? That's what Inui had said that time that he had told them about sex ed, that they didn't have to worry about pregnancy but condoms were still good anyway... Eiji couldn't remember what he had said after that, because he hadn't payed much attention to Inui and payed more attention to Oishi's bright red face, but what was important was that Inui was smart and he said that there was no way he could get pregnant. But that's not what the blood tests had said, and Eiji knew it was his blood because he had given it and it wasn't like he could or would have switched it even if he had the chance, and none of this made any sense at all!
When he looked at Oishi, he seemed confused too, confused and worried and a little stressed, but when he noticed Eiji looking, he put on a smile. "I'm sure they made a mistake," he offered, though it sounded and awful lot like he was trying to convince not only Eiji, but himself, as well. "You're probably right, I'm sure you're perfectly healthy. When they get the results from the other blood tests, they'll call and say it was just a mistake."
After parting ways with Oishi, Eiji stopped by a drug store on the way home. Oishi was probably right, he told himself, but there wasn't any harm in making sure, right? And so later that night, when he was sure his entire family had gone to bed, so tense he was sure his heartbeat was loud enough for everyone to hear and barely allowing himself to breathe, he carefully read the instructions before trying the pregnancy test thing he had picked up earlier. It said on the box in very small print that these weren't absolutely right all of the time, so Eiji tried all three. And every single one of them came out positive.
Not knowing what else to do, in the darkness of his bedroom, careful not to wake his older brother, with the keypad on silent and the backlight down all the way to the lowest setting, Eiji texted Oishi with the results.
Oishi never texted back.
Oishi was not in school the next morning. He didn't come to tennis practice the next afternoon, and he didn't pick up his phone when Eiji called him afterwards. Or, for that matter, any of the ten more times Eiji proceeded to call him throughout the course of the evening, and by the time he was getting ready for bed, Eiji was feeling more acutely alone in the world than he had in a very, very long time. After all, it was obvious Oishi was avoiding his calls, and what was worse, he didn't know why. When he said something mean or stupid and Oishi got mad-- well, Eiji didn't like it, but at least it made sense. But right now, he hadn't done anything, and there was no reason he could possibly think of that Oishi would refuse to answer his calls. It worried Eiji, gave him a churning feeling in his stomach that rivaled the nausea he had been feeling almost every morning for a week now, and after he laid in bed for an hour being completely unable to sleep, he decided to take a bath.
He tried not to think about Oishi, tried to relax, but it was exceedingly difficult when so much of his life anymore revolved around his boyfriend. They had, after all, been dating for over four years now, and Oishi was everything to Eiji, was an appendage to his state of being just as soon as his arm was an appendage to his body. Oishi was the one he loved, and, though Eiji worried that Oishi's family wouldn't see it quite the same way, Oishi had already everything but promised him that they would go pro together after high school, as a pair, as Golden Pair. So now that Oishi wasn't speaking to him, it was a crippling sort of feeling, and Eiji had to consciously distract himself with thoughts of other things.
Which led him back to the whole pregnancy issue. He had been trying hard not to think about it, and the trouble with Oishi had taken his mind off of it well enough, but still, Eiji could come up with no sensible answer for the puzzling revelation. All normal indicators were pointing towards Eiji being pregnant, and yet it was entirely an impossibility. Eiji was a boy. Male. It just didn't work that way. But then why was everything trying to tell him the contrary?
Eiji was about to go around the frustrating mental loop for the third time when his cell phone rang. It was the hospital informing him that the blood test results were back and asking him if he wouldn't be available to come in tomorrow morning. Tomorrow was Saturday and Eiji had school, but he agreed anyway. The hospital was a legitimate excuse, wasn't it? And he didn't want to think about the prospect of Oishi not being there again... perhaps it was better not to know.
And, through the forced uncertainty of it, Eiji was finally able to fall asleep around two in the morning feeling uncomfortable and dreading the sickness he knew awaited him when he awoke in the morning.
When he arrived at the hospital the next morning feeling unsure and more alone than ever, Oishi's uncle was waiting for him. Eiji followed him back to a room at the end of the hallway, listening but not much feeling like the idle conversation the doctor was trying to make. When he asked why Shuuichirou hadn't come this time, Eiji said it was because he was busy. Eiji had never been very good at lying, and he said it so glumly he was sure that Oishi's uncle would never believe him, but he didn't question it as he let Eiji into the room and told him to take a seat, closing the door behind them.
Eiji looked up at him expectantly from the chair, practically holding his breath. Hopefully, Oishi's uncle would say it was nothing, that there had been some mix-up, that he was perfectly healthy and free to go. Hopefully, he would catch the early train back and make it in time for practice and Oishi would be there and everything would be okay. It took Eiji another minute to realize he actually was holding his breath, and he willed himself to exhale as the doctor looked at his clipboard before meeting Eiji's gaze.
"We've done all the test and double checked them. I don't know what to make of it, but... Kikumaru-kun, you're definitely pregnant. All the blood tests indicate so." The doctor looked over Eiji before adding, "You'll probably be needing to come back in fairly often now, and there are some thing you need to know. I'll write everything down for you so that you won't forget, all right?"
Eiji felt himself nodding because that was what was appropriate, but he could barely think. What was going on? He had been so sure that it would all just be a mistake, that everything would be better when he left today... but he didn't understand now. What was happening? How could this possibly be true? It just didn't make any sense; it was like a strange dream, and Eiji really, really just wanted to wake up. But instead he was here, all alone, at the hospital, and Oishi's uncle was saying things to him that he probably should be paying attention to and he didn't even know how to believe that any of this was actually happening, and he didn't have Oishi here with him, and it was just too much to bear, and--
"Oh, and Kikumaru-kun, if you don't mind me asking..."
"Nn?" Eiji was brought out of his thoughts when the doctor suddenly addressed a question to him, and he hoped it wasn't too obvious that he hadn't been paying any attention at all.
"Of course, you're not obligated to tell me, but it is important that all these matters are sorted out, so, if you wouldn't mind sharing... who's the father?"
Eiji paled. As if his day couldn't get any worse.
He ended up worming his way out of the question; had it been any other doctor, there wouldn't have been half so much a problem, but he couldn't tell Oishi's uncle. Then Oishi really would have had a reason to hate him, Eiji thought to himself ruefully on the way home from the hospital, because Oishi's family was one of the most traditional families Eiji had ever seen, not anything like Eiji's own family. As far as they knew, Eiji was Oishi's very, very best friend, and while Eiji didn't like keeping secrets, he didn't like the thought of Oishi getting disowned, either, so he kept his mouth shut. It wasn't like Oishi's uncle had to know who the father was, anyway. He was probably just curious.
But then, that whole issue brought to mind a plethora of others general centred around the term "father" and all the implications therein. Eiji was still not quite able to comprehend the idea of his being pregnant (because it just wasn't possible!) and the thought of classifying Oishi as a father was inconceivable. Oishi was Eiji's boyfriend-- they were in high school, they were dating! It wasn't anything like being a family; they weren't old and they weren't married and they didn't live together or anything like that! Sure, Eiji liked to daydream that maybe one day Oishi would give him a ring or something like that-- but he was sixteen and Oishi was seventeen, and this couldn't be happening!
There were so many problems, so many impossibilities, so many things to worry about that, by the time he got home, Eiji's head was spinning. With his parents at work and his siblings at school, Eiji had the house to himself aside from his grandparents, but he didn't even know what to do with himself besides run to the room he shared with his older brother and drop onto his bed, letting out a noise of despair into his pillows. What was he going to do with himself? How was he going to make things right again? On top of everything, the doctor had scheduled him three more appointments for ultrasounds and physical examinations and a meeting with an obstetrician, and Eiji could practically feel his head swimming with the thought of all the time he was going to be spending at the hospital. If he had Oishi with him, it would be so much easier, but now... now he was entirely alone. What was he going to do?
After a good fifteen minutes of panicking, however, an idea struck him, and he wondered how he could have been stupid enough not to think of this in the first place. Retrieving his phone, he dropped back onto his bed and began to type a text message.
It was less than half an hour later when Fuji Syuusuke arrived on Eiji's doorstep, still in school uniform, but with a package of mochi as an offering and concern clearly visible in the endless blue of his eyes.
It was impossible to describe in words the feeling of relief that swept through Eiji's body when he saw his best friend at the door, and he very nearly collapsed right then and there. Instead, however, he showed Fuji inside, put the mochi in the refrigerator, led Fuji to his bedroom, sat beside Fuji on his bed, and then descended into tears, crying into Fuji's shoulder for a good ten minutes. Once the crying was out of his system, he did his best to explain, got halfway through, cried some more, checked his cell phone to make sure Oishi hadn't called or texted and he somehow missed it, cried a little more, finished explaining, and finally collapsed onto Fuji's lap with a low moan of despair. "So what am I going to do, Fuji?"
Fuji's eyes were closed now, and he looked deep in thought. Eiji wondered what he could possibly be so intently pondering. He had taken the whole "pregnant" thing rather well, considering how poorly Eiji was currently still taking it, and Eiji pondered if Fuji had even been entirely listening at all. "Fujiii!" he finally whined, resting his head on Fuji's legs and looking up at his friend. "What are you thinking about? Say something!"
"Ah, my apologies." Fuji smiled down at him, his eyes still closed pleasantly. "I was thinking about how I might feel if I discovered I was pregnant."
Eiji stuck his bottom lip out in a pout, tugging at Fuji's now-wrinkled uniform shirt. "Well, and?"
Fuji was quiet a moment. "I think I'd be frightened, just as much as you are. But I think Oishi must be frightened, as well... I don't believe he would ever do anything intentionally to hurt you."
Eiji swallowed, the thought of Oishi making his throat grow tight. This whole thing, as unbelievable and confusing and scary as it was, would be so much easier, would be nothing if only he had Oishi by his side... but he hadn't even had the chance to tell Oishi that it had been confirmed, to inform Oishi that he would be a father. He hadn't heard from Oishi since they left the hospital together two days ago, the longest they had gone without communicating for as far back as Eiji could remember. Why would Oishi do something like this to him at a time when he needed him so badly? Was it possible that Oishi could be frightened, too?
But even if that was so, Oishi ought to know that he could come to Eiji with any of his problems, right? How could they possibly resolve anything separated, especially on a matter like this? It didn't make any sense, and Oishi was the most sensical person Eiji knew... it was just so hard to believe, and so he looked up at Fuji, watery-eyed, and asked, his voice thick with the oncoming of tears, "But what should I do?"
Fuji's eyes opened at that point, and they seemed especially sharp, but they weren't directed at Eiji. For a long minute, he stared at Eiji's opposite wall before slowly surveying the room, hesitating only once on a photo of Eiji and Oishi together after nationals in middle school. When he turned his gaze back to Eiji, the look had changed, his eyes were gentler, softer. "You're not obligated to do anything, of course," he replied evenly, "But I think you should find Oishi and try to talk to him. This child is both of yours, after all. You should come to decisions as much as possible together. But--" Fuji cut off sharply, looking away again as the sharp look returned, more dangerous than the first time, and when he spoke again, Fuji's voice was almost threatening. "-- but if he puts one finger out of line, if he does anything to hurt you, come back to me right away. Do you understand, Eiji?"
Eiji swallowed, just a little frightened for a different reason. "All... all right."
Fuji's smile was back instantly, his eyes closing once more. "Wonderful. But, honestly, I think Oishi will be all right. He loves you very much, and it would be very sweet to see you two have a child together."
Eiji opened his mouth to respond, but before he could, he blinked, Fuji's words fully sinking in. He and Oishi were going to have a child together. A child together. He and Oishi.
And for the first time since the beginning of this whole business, he smiled up at Fuji. "You'll help me think of names later, won't you, Fuji?"
Fuji's smile in return was as warm and as real as the afternoon sun outside the window. "Of course."
Late into Saturday night and again on Sunday morning, Eiji considered the situation with a calmer mind than he had been able to muster since the beginning of this whole ordeal. It was still terrifying to be without Oishi, but Fuji had helped soothe his nerves infinitely, and he was right, in the end-- Eiji did have to track down Oishi, no matter what came of it. After all, Oishi was the father of his unborn child, whether he liked it or not, and regardless of any possible outcome, they had to talk. Eiji was sure of that.
The problem was, Eiji had no idea what the possible outcomes were. Sure, he and Oishi had been in plenty of spats before, fights, even, that lasted overnight, but never had Oishi simply avoided him for such a long span of time with no explanation whatsoever... What could Eiji expect when he finally did go to find Oishi? Would Oishi be angry with him, upset, as Eiji had been, or something else entirely? Would he talk to Eiji, or would he continue to try to evade him, as he had been for almost three days now? And of course, the worst of all, what would Oishi do after they had talked? What sort of decision would he come to? It was understandable not to want to have to worry about a child in the middle of junior year of high school, and Oishi was always so responsible and good about schoolwork... what if he just didn't want to deal with it? What if he didn't want to see Eiji ever again?
Of course, it was only a possibility, one of many, and Eiji didn't know what to think, what to expect, what to steel himself for. In the end, at 4:30 on Sunday afternoon, he finally decided to expect the worst, and set about mentally preparing himself for the most excruciating agony he could imagine possible. It was the only way, he reasoned, that he would ever work up the courage to go find Oishi, if he didn't have any expectations. And it wouldn't solve anything to sit around and hope it wouldn't happen... if Oishi was going to turn him away, it was better to think about what he would say in response now and just get it over with rather than living in fear and ignorance for as long as possible.
By the time he left the house to seek Oishi out, it was 8:30 at night. Luckily, however, the search was shorter than expected; when Eiji rang the doorbell at the Oishi residence, he was led inside and informed that Shuuichirou was in his bedroom and that he was welcome to just go and find him. Eiji put up a weak smile for them; they were always very kind to him in their polite way, and he bowed before padding down the hall to knock at Oishi's door, hoping that it wouldn't be slammed in his face the moment Oishi saw who it was.
Luckily, Oishi did not slam the door in his face when he answered, but rather stared at Eiji with an unreadable expression, and when he didn't speak, Eiji wrung the hem of his shirt and fidgeted, and when he spoke, his voice sounded just as desperate as he was trying not to be. "Please... Shuuichirou... let me talk to you?"
Oishi was silent a moment longer before opening the door a little further and stepping aside for Eiji to come in. He closed the door behind Eiji and followed him into the room as Eiji hesitantly looked around, unsure of what to do. He had always invited himself to do whatever he wanted in Oishi's room before, had always rolled right onto his bed or slumped into his chairs, but now, he felt as if he wasn't welcome at all, despite the fact that Oishi had, indeed let him in. Swallowing, he shifted awkwardly before turning back around to face Oishi, and, steeling himself as best as possible, he met Oishi's eyes and wrapped his arms around his middle, hugging his sides tightly. "Did... did you get all the messages I sent you...?"
Oishi nodded slowly and met Eiji's gaze again once he had, and there was something there in his eyes, though Eiji couldn't figure out what. It was unnerving, terrifying, to be so disconnected this way, not when they could so easily slip into Synchro, not when they could exist in one another's consciousness on the tennis courts, and Eiji swallowed again, doing his best not to feel any of the anxiousness or fear that he so badly wanted to feel. Slowly, clearly, determinedly, then, he said what he knew, in that moment, was the truth. "Shuuichiou... I'll... I'll get rid of it, if that's what you want." He knew that wasn't the right phrasing, he knew that sounded bad, but he didn't know how else to say it and right now, all he wanted as for Oishi to understand.
Oishi's eyes widened, and he seemed to study Eiji for a moment. After a heavy, deafening silence, he opened his mouth and finally spoke for the first time since Eiji had arrived. "... Is that what you want?"
It was at precisely this moment that Eiji's resolve broke down and he felt a rebellious tear roll down his cheek. It wasn't what he wanted, not really, but when all was accounted for, there was more important things to him than the unborn child that was causing his life to fall apart at the seams. Shaking his head quickly, he hugged his abdomen tighter as the tears began to come in earnest. "I... I just want you back!" Squeezing his eyes shut, he let his head hang in despair; he wasn't doing this at all right, and surely Oishi would be disgusted with him, would throw him out, and then he'd be all alone and he didn't even know what he'd do then--
But then there was a gentle hand softly angling his face up and another tender thumb carefully wiping away his tears, and Eiji looked up in disbelief to see Oishi... smiling at him? It couldn't be true, but there it was, a soft smile on Oishi's lips, and Eiji opened his mouth to ask when Oishi cut him off, his voice barely more than a whisper. "What do you really want, in terms of the child?"
Eiji looked at him in confusion for a moment before biting his lip and admitting, "I... I want to keep it. Because... because it's between me and you, and... and I love you."
Oishi nodded, that small smile growing, and Eiji didn't have much time to become even more confused before Oishi commented, with all the firmness of decision that Eiji so admired in him, "We'll keep it, then."
Eiji's mouth fell open and he trembled. "...We?"
And that was when Oishi drew Eiji up tight into his arms and Eiji didn't think he was even going to be able to breathe with disbelief and joy and relief when Oishi whispered into his ear, "I'm sorry, Eiji... I have no excuse, and I'm sorry. I love you."
He may have intended to say more, but Eiji didn't let him; throwing his arms around Oishi's neck, he kissed him and didn't let go, kissed him as if his life depended on it, because he had never felt this relieved in his entire life. When he finally drew back, flushed and pink-lipped, he grinned at Oishi, resting their foreheads together, so that their noses were touching. "I hope the baby has your eyes."
Oishi smiled back, not drawing away, either. "But yours are so much prettier."
Eiji laughed and kissed Oishi again, and that was the end of the discussion.