Title: Not Much of Anything
Disclaimer: I don't own any members of *pnish*, nor of Johnny's entertainment!
Pairing: Washio Noboru/Sano Mizuki. Yes, you read that right. XD;
Warnings: BL sort of? RPS and all that jazz.
Author's Note: Since I don't expect this pairing makes much sense to much of anyone... XD;;; I've written up a handy pairing manifesto so that it makes a little more sense. I think they're adorable together... even if Mizuki is kind of a jerk. XD;;;
Wasshi has been captivated with Sano Mizuki ever since the first time they met. He can still remember it now, just like it was yesterday even though it's been almost ten years-- he and Daiki had been going out to hang out with a few mutual friends from their agency, but Daiki had wanted to stop by his apartment first to pick up a few things. Good-natured as always, Wasshi had agreed, and while Daiki had run back to his room, Wasshi had waited awkwardly in the genkan. Daiki said he would only be a few minutes, but, of course, Daiki was never only a few minutes, and Wasshi had just been at the point of wondering whether he was planning on coming at all when someone else had appeared in the front entrance hall.
Wasshi had never asked about Daiki's family, but the resemblance between this man and Wasshi's own friend was clear, though not overwhelmingly so. While Daiki was eighteen, still at the tail end of puberty, lanky and awkward, this man carried himself with confidence, and with good reason. Wasshi wasn't the sort to pay attention to that sort of thing, but immediately, he couldn't help but think that this man was really honestly gorgeous, and perfectly groomed to fashion. He was slight, like Daiki, but without seeming gangly or skinny in the way Daiki did, and he sat into one hip in a way that was far to aesthetic to be natural as he surveyed Wasshi for a moment, making him feel awfully self conscious and gangly, himself.
They looked back at one another for a long moment. The man seemed to be appraising Wasshi, almost, and Wasshi could feel himself flushing even though he couldn't understand why. Finally, though, the man took another step towards him and spoke: "You're in my way."
At that, Wasshi practically tripped over himself to get out of the doorway, feeling incredibly stupid despite that his remaining there had been Daiki's fault in the first place. The man gave him a sort of half smile and a nod, stepped into a pair of shoes, and was gone, leaving Wasshi to stare after him in complete, incomprehensible awe.
Wasshi is pretty sure that Mizuki doesn't remember this encounter at all, considering the fact that Mizuki failed to remember his name even up until ShiroxKuro had disbanded and *pnish* had been formed, but it hardly matters. Mizuki has never seen Wasshi as much of anything, anyway.
Seeing as he's not a sixteen year old girl, Wasshi has never been particularly interested in Johnny's entertainment, but when he discovers all of the restrictions placed on their members, he can't help but feel it's a little unfair. Certainly, they're famous, and maybe it's slightly dangerous, but they're people too, aren't they? With lives of their own? Of course, Wasshi has never been and never will be as famous as Mizuki, so perhaps he just doesn't understand.
He discovers just how strict the rules are, however, when they're considering a guest for Panic Cafe. Daiki throws out a few names here or there. Tsuchiya and Eiji suggest various members of the Tenimyu cast. Wasshi, as always, remains quiet at the three bicker over some of the choices before finally building up the courage to add in his own choice: Sano Mizuki.
Daiki is the first to respond, looking at him like he's crazy. When Wasshi embarrassedly explains that it's because they've never been able to work with Mizuki-san before, and he's so talented, and wouldn't it be nice because he's Daiki's brother, he's met with a blank stare and a shrug. Mizuki's a Johnny's, Daiki explains, and getting a contract for him would be a pain, with all their rules, and besides, they wouldn't be able to pay him enough, and he wouldn't be allowed to participate in any of the photoshoots, so it's really just out of the question.
With each reason, Wasshi deflates a little, and, in the end, he agrees with everyone that inviting Nitta-san would be a good choice, but he can't help but hope that, maybe in a few years, they'll be at a place where getting Mizuki to join them wouldn't be quite so hard.
Mizuki comes to see Treasure Box. "Finally," Daiki complains afterwards, "You never come see me, Aniki!" Eiji and Mizuki chat like they're old friends because they were in that one show together, way back in the day. Tsuchiya and Mizuki chat like they're old friends because Tsuchiya's that way with everyone. Wasshi hangs to the back of the group and doesn't get in the way.
Afterwards, they all go out for drinks together. They sit at the bar, Wasshi the farthest from Mizuki because he held the door for everyone as they came in. He says nothing, though, and leans over the counter, cradling his drink between his palms as he listens to Mizuki's stories that get more long-winded and self-centered the more drinks he has. "Aniki!" Daiki complains, "Quit talking about yourself all the time!" Mizuki gripes but stops, and Wasshi wishes Daiki hadn't said anything at all.
The conversation moves to singing, and then acting, and then plays. Uncharacteristically, Mizuki compliments Treasure Box, saying that Daiki-chan was cute and Tsuchiya was hilarious (Wasshi knew that nothing was coming his way, but he held his breath, regardless). He goes on about how doing dramas isn't the same at all as doing stage, and sometimes it's harder or it's easier, but it's more fun with there's a live audience, and though Wasshi has never been on TV before, the way Mizuki explains it, about the audience's energy and responses and support, he can't help but agree.
And then, "Hey," Mizuki says, "You should have me in your next show! That'll make it twenty times better!" He's clearly drunk, as evidenced by the way he slams his glass down onto the counter, but Wasshi can't help but hope desperately that he actually means it.
And maybe he's a little bit drunk, too, because he's the one who responds, speaking for practically the first time in the whole night. "We'd be honored," he promises, but if the way Mizuki smiles in response is any indication, it's clear that he's really speaking for himself.
Wasshi doesn't ask to be the one to interview Mizuki for the Wonder Box DVD, but Daiki assigns things that way, anyway. Wasshi doesn't know whether to think it's a freak coincidence or if, perhaps, his feeling are more obvious than he'd like to believe. Not that he's ever had any delusions otherwise, but Wasshi has long come to terms with the fact that Mizuki will always be more to him as an actor, as a performer, as a person than he will ever be to Mizuki, and he wishes that that weren't quite so clear to everyone else in *pnish*, as well. Still, at least they've been tactful enough not to tease him about it; there have been a few Wasshi's-quitting-pnish jokes in the past few months, but no one's said a word on the topic of Mizuki, not even Tsuchiya, a fact for which Wasshi is incredibly grateful. But apparently, it's clear enough that Daiki has deemed it appropriate to pair his brother with Wasshi for the interviews, and so now Wasshi is nervous and flustered, fingering the paper of topics he's been given as they start to film.
Of course, it doesn't help that Mizuki chooses to start off the interview by asking Wasshi why he's stuck filming with him when Wasshi is the bottom of *pnish*, and Wasshi doesn't know what to do but to agree. It's his role, anyway, to be the brunt of the joke, and when it's the rest of the group, he doesn't really mind. It's just the way they've always got along, and he knows they don't mean it whenever they say something obnoxious about him just like they don't mean it when they call Tsuchiya busaiku. But when Mizuki says it... it stings a little bit more than it ought to for reasons that Wasshi doesn't want to confront but understands a little too well.
And the interview doesn't get any easier as it goes along, either. Mizuki spends the entire thing leaning in close to him, reading over his shoulder, touching him in ways that should be perfectly normal and yet that make Wasshi's heart rate accelerate just a little and his skin tingle. And when Mizuki informs him that no one will even notice he was in the play, what is he to do but agree that he's worried?
It feels much longer than it is, but then finally, the interview is done, and he rises to go. Mizuki follows suit and places a hand on Wasshi's shoulder, though, and, naturally, Wasshi freezes. He ought to be better at this by now, really, after months of rehearsal with Mizuki, but Mizuki smiles at him anyway. "Ours is going to be the best interview, right?"
Wasshi has the feeling that the implication is that anything with Mizuki is inherently the best, but of course, even with that, he cannot argue. And the fact that they have something which is theirs and no one else's makes Wasshi smile a little as he nods in agreement.
By some freak miracle of fate, Wasshi ends up sitting next to Mizuki at the Wonder Box uchiage. It doesn't mean much, since Wasshi is never the centre of conversation, but at the very least, it's him who Mizuki is leaning up against when he tries to make himself heard over the crowd, it's his elbow that Mizuki's is brushing up against, his foot that Mizuki is kicking under the table. It's pretty pathetic, honestly, that Wasshi takes pleasure in any of this at all, but there's just something about Mizuki, there's always been something about Mizuki that has Wasshi enthralled, and though he can't quite put his finger on it, he doesn't understand why Mizuki's presence doesn't draw anyone else in. After all, his presence, in and of itself, is something else; confident, composed, Mizuki is radiant even without saying a word, even without showing off all the talents Wasshi knows he possesses, and that's more than Wasshi can say for practically anyone else he's met.
Over the course of the night, as is always the case, the conversation dies down and then splits up into various different conversations as people get drunker and less coherent after a long run of shows. Wasshi sits quietly and nurses his drink as Mizuki chats with Eiji across the table from them, feeling contented that, at the very least, he got to spend the evening next to Mizuki when, all of a sudden, Daiki demands Eiji's attention and Wasshi is left with Mizuki to himself.
Even with the alcohol, he's suddenly self conscious, but Mizuki is confident as ever and doesn't even seem to notice, and luckily, it doesn't take very much participation to have a conversation with Mizuki when Mizuki is drunk, because, it seems, he can go on about himself for quite some time. Wasshi doesn't mind; it's fascinating, and, in fact, it's felt like no time at all when, an hour and a half later, Mizuki glances at his watch and announces, "God, it's late!"
Wasshi licks his lips, trying to find his voice. He hasn't had that much to drink, but its enough that, in combination with Mizuki's presence, he's not at his most eloquent. "Gotta get home?" It comes out a little slurred and he immediately blushes, feeling stupid, but Mizuki just waves at him noncommittally.
"Eh," he replies, as if that's an answer, before crossing his arms. "Ya know, Wasshi, you're all right. We oughta do this more often."
Wasshi's jaw practically drops. "Seriously?" he asks, and then immediately regrets it, because that makes it sound like he doesn't want to, and if Mizuki actually means what he's saying, then god, Wasshi can't blow this chance, because he wants it too badly.
But Mizuki is unfazed. "Sure," he replies, grinning. "You're pretty cool, after all." Finishing the last of his beer, he grabs a napkin, scrawling something on it before handing it to Wasshi. "Call me sometime."
And as Wasshi accepts the paper and nods more enthusiastically than he means to, a stupid smile fighting its way onto his face, he can't help but think that, even if Mizuki doesn't see him as much of anything, just knowing that Mizuki can see him at all is more than enough.