title: 'Tis the Season
pairing: Takahashi Fu/Kishi Yuta
word count: 1,175
author's note: Kishi is adorable. |D; I seriously love how faily and cute he is.
summary: Kishi is terrified of Christmas.
Kishi is terrified of Christmas. Everything was much easier, he thinks, when he was a kid and still believed in Santa (and okay, maybe he still believes just a little bit, because he still gets presents along with his little sister, and there's really no way to prove that there isn't a Santa…) and the main perks of the Christmas season were new toys and chicken and cake. But now that he's eighteen and it's supposed to be a romantic holiday… well, that's a whole different story.
Because Kishi is terrified of romance, and all those sorts of things, terrified and overwhelmed and confused by words like "love" and "dating" and "boyfriend." Of course, he has a boyfriend, a boyfriend who takes him on dates and who says "I love you" several times a day, in person or over the phone or through text messages (or in magazines or on TV…), but honestly, Kishi doesn't really know what to do about that, either. He likes Fu, likes him a lot, enough to brave the fear and uncertainty, to open up to him in ways that he didn't even know he could open up, but at the same time, he still doesn't really understand it all, either, doesn't understanding the conventions and rules of dating, or what he's supposed to say when Fu says he loves him, and he still chokes over the word "boyfriend." But just being with Fu is enough for him, having Fu there to take care of him and bring him to coffee or dinner or his bedroom and teach him new things about life and people and himself is enough for him. Jinguji laughs at him for being the "girl" to a fifteen-year-old, but Kishi doesn't care. Fu always knows what to do, and even if sometimes, it's scary and confusing to Kishi, he knows that at the end of the day, he'll always have Fu to catch him if he stumbles.
But Christmas… this Christmas ordeal is a whole different story. Because Christmas is a whole new set of dos and don'ts, a whole new standard that Kishi has to wrap his mind around and try not to be overwhelmed by and attempt to live up to, and he isn't sure he can do it. After all, he hasn't even been in a relationship for all that long, can still barely manage to handle having a boyfriend in his daily life, and with a main event like Christmas, he's sure he's going to do something wrong. Jinguji has been going on for weeks now about how it's all about finding the right balance between being too mushy and not being romantic enough, and Shori has read him several seasonal poems on the subject, and Reia has mentioned his present shopping plans off and on, and all of it just seems like too much for Kishi. Because how is he to know what's too romantic or not romantic enough when he barely can handle anything vaguely romantic on a regular old date, how is he to think poetically about Christmas when he can barely understand it in the simplest of terms, how can he possibly know what sort of present is suited to Christmas? It's all a big mystery that leaves his head spinning every time he thinks about it.
And so as stores fill their windows with red and green decorations for the holiday season, as senpai show off flashy wristwatches and glittering accessories bought for special someones, as even Kishi's friends all seem to become absorbed with thoughts of Christmas and Christmas alone, Kishi becomes more and more overwhelmed and terrified, and by the time, a week and a half before the day itself, Fu asks him if he wants to do anything on Christmas, something in him snaps, and he explodes that he just can't.
Fu blinks at him in shock, and from the very small part of his brain that's still functioning logically, he realizes that so much emotion at such a simple question might be startling, but Kishi can't help it. There are tears welling in his eyes as Fu blinks at him before looking slightly crestfallen and asking, "...oh, are you busy…?"
Kishi squeezes his eyes shut, because he can't stand the look on Fu's face, but his head feels like it's caught in a whirlpool, spinning around and around so fast that he can't get his bearings. "I don't know what to do!" he wails, shaking his head and feeling like the whole world is falling on him. "I don't know what you're supposed to do for Christmas, and I don't know what present to get, and I don't understand what's going on!"
He also doesn't know how he expects Fu to respond; Fu has never gotten annoyed with his incompetence before, but Christmas is special, he knows, Christmas is supposed to be the main event of the year for couples, and so maybe, he worries, cowering all the more, maybe this time Fu will be angry, will tell him off…
But instead all he hears is laughing, and before he can even find the courage to open his eyes again, he feels a warm, comforting, familiar hand atop his head, ruffling his hair. To anyone else, the gesture might seem patronizing, but somehow, to Kishi, there's always been something comforting, something just right about it.
"Don't worry about any of that," Fu says, smiling warmly at Kishi when Kishi finally manages to look up at him with wide, watery eyes. "I don't care what we do. I don't care if you get me anything."
"…What?" Kishi asks, because after everything that he's been hearing for weeks and weeks now, that just doesn't make sense, and even if they are unconventional, even he lets a fifteen year old take care of him, even if Fu is usually the most easygoing and relaxed person he knows (except when he tells Winkup about his everlasting and undying love…), Kishi doesn't know what to make of that response.
"Christmas is supposed to be for spending time having fun with the person you love, right?" Fu replies with a wink. "So if you're not going to have fun, there's no point in doing any of the normal stuff."
And Kishi is still in the process of comprehending how logical and easy and straightforward that is when Fu slings an arm around him, pulling Kishi closer and looking into his eyes in that way he does with the smile that makes Kishi feel weak in the knees and adds, "As long as I'm with you, I'll have the best Christmas possible. And besides, the only thing I want for Christmas is you."
And maybe he's just silly, maybe he's just stupid, but somehow, suddenly, everything feels clear to Kishi, and as his head begins to spin again, in the good way that always happens when Fu holds him close, his cheeks colouring as he lets Fu kiss him on the forehead, he thinks, maybe Fu is the best Christmas present he could possibly ask for, too.