title: 愛及屋烏 (aikyuu okuu)
pairings: Kishi/Fu (side Jinguji/Reia and Miyachika/Genki… and I guess Matsuda Genta→Yamada Ryosuke?)
word count: 2,626
author's note: For the Tomochoco 2014 Challenge! The prompt was "61. Juniors have notebooks in which they write notes about choreography/stage movements/etc. A-kun’s notebook is filled with notes about B-kun instead." The title is a Japanese saying that roughly translates to "When you love someone you'll even love the bird on their roof," meaning that people often fall so in love with someone that they love everything about them, even really strange or extreme things. For luna_truths, because she said her life needs more Kishi~
summary: Fu understands that Kishi doesn't have the emotional maturity yet to fully accept all of Fu's love, and he can wait, he can wait until the end of time for Kishi… but he has to get the feelings out somewhere, or he'll explode.
Behind Kishi-kun again ♥
His hair is growing out
He always does the arms too fast at the beginning of the chorus
His T-shirt is too big today
I can see his back when he jumps~
"Hm~ that doesn't look like choreography notes~" Reia comments over Fu's shoulder, causing Fu to jump from where he sits on the floor of the rehearsal studio, scribbling furiously before he forgets. Around him, most of his peers are doing the same, brows furrowed in concentration as they take notes in their notebooks about the choreography they've been reviewing today. But while Fu does have his doubts about some of them, he's fairly certain that most of their notebooks contain notes about counts and timing and positions, and probably not about the person dancing in front of them.
Still, he shrugs at Reia. "It's not like I'm ever the one messing up the dance," he replies offhandedly, and while it sounds arrogant (though Reia of all people should be understanding, considering how much time he spends with Jinguji), it's pretty much true. Fu is one of the few juniors who's had extensive dance training outside of Johnny's, to the point that remembering the choreography and hitting his marks on time all the time isn't ever a problem. Normally, he'd try to be good, but really, when he doesn't need as much practice as everyone else and the most amazing person in the whole universe just happens to be right in front of him for practically the whole dance… well, who can blame him for letting his mind wander a little.
"Mm, fair enough, I guess~" Reia hums in response, glancing over what Fu's written before squinting at Kishi from where he's fooling around with Jinguji and Miyachika across the room as Genki rolls his eyes at them over his homework. "Does he know that you write this stuff?" he adds after a moment, grinning at Fu in a way that makes Fu want to swat him even though he teases Reia just as much in turn.
"I say it all to his face anyway," Fu replies quickly, shutting the notebook and sticking his tongue out at Reia. "I'm just writing it down so that next time he goes to Kansai or something, I'll have something to remember him by." Which isn't entirely a lie; Fu still isn't quite sure how he made it through Dream Boys while Kishi was off in Endless SHOCK in Osaka, but it's not entirely the truth, either. Fu isn't really sure there's even a reason he writes these notes about Kishi; it's more that he can't help himself. Kishi is so beautiful and so perfect and so breathtakingly amazing in every way, and Fu doesn't know how else to express the feelings of admiration that bubble up inside him every time Kishi is before his eyes and threaten to overflow. He tells Kishi he loves him, tells Kishi he's wonderful and gorgeous and a work of art, but he knows that Kishi can only handle so much praise before it begins to make him panic, before he stops being able to understand the depth of Fu's feelings, and so he has to put them somewhere else. He understands that Kishi doesn't have the emotional maturity yet to fully accept all of Fu's love, and he can wait, he can wait until the end of time for Kishi… but he has to get the feelings out somewhere, or he'll explode.
"You're so weird~" Reia chimes, bringing Fu out of his thoughts again and making him frown.
"This from the guy whose boyfriend smells him all the time!" he hollers at Reia's back as Reia flits away, but he doesn't have the energy to argue as Reia only shrugs and joins Genki to make peanut gallery comments about the stupidity going on on that side of the room. Maybe Reia is right, maybe he is weird, but he isn't sure what else he can do. Kishi knows how he feels already, and telling him any more, Fu is sure, would only scare him away. For Kishi, he has to be patient, and goddammit, he'll be patient even if it kills him… but for the time being, he has to do something else, as well, to pull him through.
Kishi-kun looks so good during his solo ♥
Happy I get to back for him~
His voice is so amazing
And his gaze is so intense~~~
His fingernails have gotten long
I bet he forgot to cut them again…
His hands are so amazing, though~~~
I love when he gestures while he sings ♥
"Wow… amazing…" Fu suddenly hears in a breathy whisper from over his shoulder, and he looks up with an eyebrow already raised to find Matsuda Genta staring wide-eyed at his notebook. Genta-kun is a good kid and Fu likes him, but sometimes, he has the tendency to sneak up on people and doesn't always have the best filter when he gets excited.
But Fu knows what it's like to get excited, and so, "That's… different from the reaction I usually get," he remarks mildly, grinning at Genta-kun and reaching back to ruffle his hair a bit. "What's up, kid?"
Genta-kun blushes a little and shrugs, scooting closer to Fu and smiling shyly at him. "I mean, it's amazing that you can write such detailed things about Kishi-kun that way," he clarifies, gazing at Fu's notebook in awe as he reads the previous entries as well. "You really notice every little thing about him, and it's obvious how much you care about him."
Now Fu can feel himself blush too, but he shrugs, trying not to let Genta-kun's innocent curiosity get the best of him. Of course, leave it to a cute little kid to naively put what Fu tries to keep to himself into words, but, Fu tells himself, it's not really a big deal. Kishi-kun disappeared into the hallway with Reia and Jinguji to get a drink from the vending machine and hasn't returned, so there's no threat of Fu's devotion being outed, and he knows Genta-kun only means the best. And so he shrugs, closing the notebook and turning to face Genta-kun with a laugh.
"It's not that hard, kiddo," he replies after a moment, shrugging and trying not to make it seem like a big deal. The last thing he wants is Genta-kun blabbing to everyone about Fu's creeper notebook or something, and even though he knows Genta-kun only wants the best with all his earnest little heart, it doesn't necessarily mean he wouldn't mess things up for Fu big time completely by accident. Genta-kun can be a persistent little kid, after all, and Fu doesn't want him blowing this out of proportion.
But to his surprise, Genta-kun only smiles and nods, hugging his knees to his chest and resting his chin on them. "It's nice, just to like someone, isn't it?" he asks quietly, glancing at his own notebook with a sigh. "It doesn't really matter if they like you back or not. It feels good to just… like them, right?"
And, Fu realizes belatedly, naive and cute and innocent as Genta-kun is, maybe somehow, this kid understands him better than anyone else. Maybe, in his own silly, fourteen-year-old way, Genta-kun doesn't have the relationship expectations that everyone else always piles onto Fu, doesn't have the ulterior motives or the idea of what a relationship "should" be. Sure, maybe Genta-kun's senpai crush is a little different than the fact that Fu is sort of, maybe, tentatively dating Kishi-kun despite the fact that Kishi-kun can't handle the strength of his feelings just yet, but at the same time, maybe admiring someone is a little bit the same, no matter what. It's a little silly, but it's a little nice, too, to be understood by someone in the most unexpected way, and so he nods, moving to sit beside Genta-kun again and purposefully bumping shoulders with him. "It does feel good," he replies with a grin, and there really is something pleasant about the way Genta-kun looks up at him with wide eyes full of understanding and an even wider smile. "So, are you going to show me what you have in your notebook?"
At the end of twenty pages of umbrellas and unfortunate sketches of Genta-kun and Yamada Ryosuke's future wedding, Fu is a little bit sorry he asked, but on the other hand, it does make him feel better that he's not quite that delusional.
Kishi-kun's arms are still too fast
The choreographer hasn't said anything…
Maybe because it's cuter this way ♥
His shorts keep sliding down…
Be careful!! That's dangerous!!
No one else better be looking…
His dancing is amazing as usual, though ♥
He makes everyone else look bad.
"You're really diligent," Genki's voice, quiet and unassuming but alarmingly close nonetheless, wafts into Fu's consciousness, and he blinks, surprised to see Genki sitting beside him, looking at his own painstakingly neat notebook with nothing to hint that he'd even spoken to Fu besides the small smile on his lips. Fu frowns, because he knows Genki is probably the most diligent human being on earth, or at very least, the most diligent junior in their little group, and he's not entirely sure that he's not being mocked. It would be unlike Genki, but then again, Genki's been spending a lot of time around Jinguji these days, so who knows.
"I don't get in trouble in rehearsal, so--" he starts but Genki looks up at him and blinks before shaking his head, and Fu is confused.
"No," Genki replies quietly, his expression so unobtrusive that Fu wonders how anyone could dislike him (though he supposes jealousy is a green-eyed monster; it's how he writes off when anyone talks badly of Kishi-kun, how he tries to keep himself from storming around raging at no one over trivial comments of stupid juniors who only wish they were as talented as Kishi-kun), and he smiles again, setting his notebook aside and leaning back against the wall. "I really think it's admirable, to think of all the good things about someone you like and write them down. It's such a positive thing to do."
Fu blinks right back at Genki, because no one has ever put it in words like that before. For all the times that people have teased him, or told him he was silly, in the most friendly of ways, even, no one has outright praised him for his notes on Kishi, and he's not really sure how to respond.
He waffles for a few moments, but clearly, Genki notices that he's made Fu uncomfortable, and as Genki is want to do, he shrinks back a bit, shrugging. "I mean. Love can be so selfish sometimes. So it's good to focus purely on the good things, without expecting to get something for your compliments, or something… right?"
Fu knows that Genki is probably the most painfully nice, unselfish person out of anyone in their entire agency, but he still doesn't quite understand what Genki is getting at. After all, isn't love about thinking good things about that person, about loving everything about that person, unconditionally? Fu supposes love must be different for everyone, what with how much pressure he gets from the others, who all want to tell him he's doing it wrong, but he also knows that waiting sucks, and he guesses he can understand the others' negative reaction to Fu doing so much of it. But Fu can wait forever for Kishi, and he's about to write Genki's comment off as finally one of his friends understanding that when he happens to notice the way Genki's expression has changed and follow Genki's gaze until it hits Miyachika halfway across the room, and then everything clicks.
And maybe Fu's doing this whole relationship thing wrong according to everyone else, but he likes to think of himself as a romantic every now and again, and he definitely likes to see his friends happy, and so he moves to sit next to Genki, elbowing him gently. "You know he brags about you all the time, right? I've heard him. And Reia says he never shuts up about you at school, all like, my boyfriend's the most popular Junior in all of Johnny's!"
There's something rewarding about the way Genki's face lights up a brilliant shade of red before breaking out into the biggest grin Fu's ever seen on him. Fu wishes he could do the same thing for Kishi, but he supposes Genki is right; even if he has to wait forever, it's best to be positive, right? Because, for now, at least, that's about all that he can do.
Fu comes into the rehearsal studio on the afternoon of February 14th in a panic; somehow, he's managed to leave his notebook at the rehearsal studio, and he's not sure whether he's more terrified that it will be gone forever along with months of Kishi-kun observations, or that someone will find it and read it and possibly convey this information to Kishi-kun himself. He's been kicking himself since Wednesday night, when he realized it was gone, for being so careless, but now, he knows there's nothing he can do but search.
He's come in a bit early, but there are a few other juniors milling around, and despite the desperation of the situation, he can't help but pause to greet Kishi-kun (who seems to have mistaken the rehearsal time for an hour earlier and been sitting around this whole time staring into space) before continuing with his quest. The notebook isn't where he assumes he must have left it on Wednesday, on the dressing room counter, and it isn't in the hall or on any of the seats in the waiting room, and it isn't with the music equipment on the table off to the side of the rehearsal hall. Fu double checks everywhere and is about to give up when suddenly, he notices a little stretch of colour poking out from behind one of the black curtains used to block the mirrors when it gets close to show time, and his heart almost leaps out of his chest as he dives for it and finds that, sure enough, it's his notebook.
He can't help but flip through the pages a few times just to make sure nothing's missing; not that anyone would want to steal his notes on Kishi-kun, per se, but then again, Kishi-kun is amazing, and perhaps some other secret admirer has been lurking in wait for Fu to let his guard down. Still, it seems like everything is in order, and Fu is about to close the notebook and count his lucky stars when suddenly, something in a handwriting that isn't his own after Fu's last page of notes catches his attention. His heart leaps into his throat when he recognizes the handwriting almost instantly as Kishi-kun's, but even after all the emotional ups and downs that this notebook has brought him in the past few days, nothing could possibly have prepared him for the feeling he gets as he reads what's written:
I make everyone else look bad, huh? (ò w ó)
You better not slack off then!
Because then you'll fall behind.
And I don't want you to be anywhere besides right behind me.
Because I like you, too. (o u o)
Even if you write weird notes a lot.
I guess they say "When you love someone you'll even love the bird on their roof."
… do you have birds on your roof…? (O A O);
… I mean… um… oh right.
Happy Valentine's Day.
2014 Tomochoco Challenge Works
arashijun | faded-lace 1 2 3 | lady-michiru | mousapelli 1 2 3 | ohhai-yo | rikikomori | tokyoskater | vflmaeuschen 1 2 | yomimashou