pairing: Yamada Ryosuke x Chinen Yuri
word count: 978
author's note: I was inspired by last week's Little Tokyo Live~ Set directly after the live filming on February 18th, 2015.
summary: Yamada can't help but feel proud, that this genius is his boyfriend, that Chinen, in all his wonder, has chosen him.
Chinen is humming something quietly to himself as he opens the passenger side door of Yamada's red Mercedes convertible, climbing without any flourish and yet somehow still with a gracefulness that, Yamada thinks, he must have been born with. Somehow, everything about Chinen is perfect; even when he collapses onto the sofa in the dressing room after rehearsals or staggers into the kitchen for coffee on the rare morning off that they can spend in bed together, it almost seems like every movement is a part of a greater dance, the dance that is Chinen's perfect life. It sounds stupidly cheesy, like the lines Yamada is forced to say on TV and in concerts and during magazine interviews as fanservice, but he often thinks that Chinen must be an angel who's fallen from heaven, rather than a normal person, because there's no way he and Yamada, full of faults, full of mistakes, full of emotions that he can't always keep in check, can be made of the same stuff. And even now, fiddling with the radio and plugging in his own iPod without even asking permission as Yamada starts up the engine, he seems too perfect, too good to be true, too wonderful to settle for dating someone like Yamada.
And while now Yamada knows that that's not how the world works, and that Chinen's feelings for him are as true and real as he always tells Yamada they are, he still can't help but appreciate the fact that Chinen has chosen him, over everyone else in JUMP, everyone else in Johnny's, everyone else in the whole world. He used to doubt, and then after that, he used to struggle, used to have to repeat to himself again and again about how Chinen really did love him, it wasn't all a big joke or a dream, but now, somehow, years later, it's gotten easier. Now, when he watches Chinen, in all his brilliance, it's with awe, not worry, with wonder and not fear. And it's gotten easier, too, to accept Chinen's perfection not as competition, but as a compliment to his life, to understand that somehow, in some way, Chinen sees him as as wonderful as he sees Chinen.
And so everything feels lighter and easier than it had when they were young and immature (both of them, but mostly Yamada, really), and when he's on TV with Chinen, he doesn't feel nervous or self conscious anymore; doesn't feel that Chinen's successes are his own failure; in fact, while he can't help but compare himself a little bit, deep down, he also, equally, can't help but feel proud, that this genius is his boyfriend, that Chinen, in all his wonder, has chosen him. It's not hard, in that way, to pass off the decision-making to Chinen on Little Tokyo Live, and to be awed in the face of Chinen's unending genius. Sure, he jokes about it when he's called to in the comedy skit, about how Chinen was so much smarter than him, but really, he's nothing but happy just to be allowed to love someone so perfect (not to mention to be able to eat the reward when Chinen gets answers correct).
It's a warm feeling, knowing that no matter what else is going on in their lives, work stress and personal stress and whatever else, things are okay between them, okay for them, now, as a couple, as a set, as a team, and he can't help but gaze fondly at Chinen as he sets his iPod to a familiar Arashi playlist. Chinen, for his part, raises an eyebrow as he sets the song to Kumorinochi Kaisei.
"So are we just going to sit in the parking garage all night?" he asks after a beat, his lips quirking up in that irresistibly playful grin that won over so many of their senpai, so many of their groupmates… that had won over Yamada years and years ago. "How romantic~"
Yamada's cheeks heat slightly as he puts the car into gear, but he knows the teasing is good-natured, and so he swallows any lingering defensiveness (he's not perfect, even now) before laughing and replying, "Your ideal date is in a parking lot at one am? If only I had known that on our last anniversary." It rolls off his tongue easily, more easily, even, than he expects, and he smiles.
Chinen smiles too, gazing at Yamada as Yamada pulls out of the parking spot and maneuvers them out of the garage. It always makes Yamada a little self conscious when Chinen watches him drive, but at the same time, the look in Chinen's eyes, as if Yamada is the most interesting thing in the world to him, is enough to make up for it. "So what were you thinking about just now?" Chinen asks after a moment, once they're out on the road, the movement of his long eyelashes batting catching the corner of Yamada's eye.
And so "…You," he responds easily, embarrassing as it is, "And how perfect you are."
He isn't sure what he expected, but Chinen only laughs, his face lighting up even brighter than the windows, the advertisements, the streetlights all around them. "What's so funny?" Yamada asks with a pout, because even though he knows Chinen would never laugh at him, he sometimes wishes everything about the world was as obvious to him as it was to Chinen.
But Chinen only shakes his head, eyes glittering even at this late hour. "It's funny," he replies, his voice singsong even over the sound of the music, "because I was just thinking the same thing about you."
And somehow, despite the fact that Yamada has never felt like he amounted to much of anything, when brilliant, wonderful, perfect Chinen says things like that, he can't help but believe them, just a little.