For a limited time, Inoo is going to have his very own JWeb! You can find it on the JUMP page, underneath JUMPaper. It's called "Inoo Sakubun" ("Inoo Essay" in English). I usually don't translate JWeb entries because you can access them officially in English now, but I decided since this is just a special short term thing, I'd go ahead and do it. Inoo is totally ridiculous… but I want to share his ridiculousness with the world. XD;
So with no further ado… the very first issue of "Inoo Sakubun!"
Translator's note: Inoo has a really particular way of writing J-web (pretty similarly to the way he talks; I don't know how noticeable it is to non-Japanese speakers, but he slurs his words together and uses a lot of slang); he doesn't use very much punctuation, uses a lot of slang, and generally doesn't write very 'formally.' I've done my best to capture the feeling of that here, but I'm not a professional translator or anything of the sort, so I'm sorry it's a bit rough around the edges!
Inoo Kei's short-term central serialization.
From a uniquely 'Inoo' point of view, he'll share various information about his activities and current state, as well as behind-the-scenes stories!
Waah!! I'm Inoo, and my short-term serialization has been started!
Umm~ I've got no clue what to write in a short-term serialization!
Since it's called 'Inoo Essay,' maybe I'll write it like an essay, or something~ lol
It's like… let's not say short term; I wanna do it for about a mid-length-term~
I want to try my best and update in red beans, but please accept it if I update in about middle beans, okay?*
Umm~ I don't really have anything to say~ lol
What d'you want me to write?
'Cause if you tell me I'll write about that, you know, lol
Tell me soon, okay!!
For now, I guess I'll talk about what I ate today…
For breakfast, I ate sushi right at the scene lol**
Talking about sushi for breakfast really makes me sound like an aristocrat, huh, lol
If you're not living like, giving waka*** as presents, or something, you can't eat sushi for breakfast, right?
I forgot what I had for lunch lol
You see, my brain only has about 1024KB of memory~
What the heck did I eat… I don't even know!
In the evening, after we finished rehearsal for 'Karafuto Ojisan,' I ate chicken wings with everyone!
Going for food as a group after rehearsals is becoming routine
I'm the only one who ate white rice as a side dish to chicken wings lol
So~ I got tired, so I'm gonna sleep!
Hmmm, when will I update next~ If it seems like a lot of people are watching, I'll update faster, so speak up if you're watching, okay
*As far as I can tell, this is a really bad pun. The word for red beans in Japanese, azuki (小豆) is written with the kanji for "small" and "bean." "Middle beans" (中豆) doesn't really mean anything in Japanese and isn't a real Japanese word, but it seems he was making a pun off of "short-term," pronounced tanki in Japanese, and mid-length-term, chuuki (中期) in Japanese, with the same kanji for "middle," and the fact that the kanji for "bean" can also be pronounced ki.
**I think he's making fun of himself "reporting" on what he had for breakfast, because it's such a boring, banal topic.
***Waka is a type of traditional Japanese poems particularly associated with the aristocracy of the Heian Period (794-1185 CE).
He's so stupidly cute |D;;; But I'm really excited he's getting this opportunity! And did you see his placement on Chau# / Oh I need you??? On the RE he's in the same row with Yamada and Chinen!! I'm so excited for him ;~~~;